“This Lamb Sells Condos” – Owen Pallett fansite

Final Fantasy → He Poos Clouds → “This Lamb Sells Condos”

Lyrics

No hope for the village, no hope for the village
A merchant’s in our midst and with a barrel fist
He’s coloured every surface, he’s slapped up a portrait
And yes, it is his own! He’s gonna take your home!
Have you seen our visitor? Look! Over the treetops!
Newly conjured erections are making him a killing
And Richmond St. is illing, so the graduates are willing
To buy in to the pillage, now there’s no hope for the village

Prisoners, be silent, be silent and be sharp

When he was a young man, he conjured up a firemare
Burnt off both his eyebrows and half a head of hair
And then as an apprentice, he took a drowish mistress
Who bestowed upon his youthfulness a sense of champagne chic
His seduction, his seduction to the world of construction
Now his mind will start to wander when he’s not at his computer
And his massive genitals refuse to cooperate
No amount of therapy can hope to save his marriage

Prisoners, be silent, be silent and be sharp

Can you hear them talking? Listen through the wall:

“Nothing to do, nothing to do
Living rent-free is boring me
Got no use for my PE Degree
Got no use for my pedigree

Hedi Slimane

I feed you every morning and ask so little

And agnès b.

But you belittle all the work, all the work that I do

I’m not content

When you take that walk without permission

I’m not content

I’m not defensive, I’m just saying this cause I love you

Donna Karan

You know I hate it when your friends are in the pool

And Kara Saun

Old money stinks, send those faggots back to Forest Hill

I’m not content

Contentment? What contentment? I am bald and impotent

I’m not content

Is that what it’s about? Oh honey, honey, shut your mouth”

Music videos

Directed by Stephanie Comilang and Jamie Shannon, the first video is shadow play and the second video is a live version of the first.

“The actors in the video are Cece and Sasha. I don’t know Cece very well (and that’s probably not how you spell her name) but Sasha is a 19-year old who helps out at Blocks and plays Velvet Underground on the ukelele.” —Owen [source]

Meaning

“This Lamb Sells Condos” is a song by Owen Pallett ostensibly written about Toronto realtor Brad J. Lamb and the Dungeons & Dragons school of Conjuration (the things conjured are condos). The title was an advertising slogan used by Lamb. Working titles included “The Ghost of Brad J Lamb” and “The Shroud of Brad J Lamb”.

Owen Pallett and Brad J. Lamb used to live in the same building. The last lines of lyrics are supposed to depict a fight between Lamb and his girlfriend as heard through the wall or ceiling; actually, Owen had heard most of it yelled by other people. [source] The two were interviewed about the song on the HGTV show Big City Broker, a documentary following Lamb’s business (see below).

“This

Regarding “drowish mistress”, a drow is an evil dark elf in Dungeons & Dragons.

Richmond St. is a street in downtown Toronto. Forest Hill is a rich low-density neighbourhood with mansions and old money.

Hedi Slimane, agnès b., Donna Karan, and Kara Saun are fashion designers.

Owen Pallett said…

“I’ve stated publicly that the song is not meant to be an indictment of Mr. Lamb but one of myself and other condo dwellers. The actual quality of life offered by condo living is far lower than the lifestyle that brokers and developers are selling… ‘This Lamb Sells Condos’ is, furthermore, a satire, and not meant to be taken literally.

“The producers of the show and I chatted for an hour or two, and took some ambient footage of me, practising some studies, and walking around in front of Susur. I’ve been watching the show for the last month, hoping to catch a glimpse of myself and ensure that I didn’t look like an asshole.

“While watching, I’ve begun to feel compassion for Mr. Lamb and his team. His goals and process seem to be genuine. He isn’t trying to make as much money as possible… he truly believes that his work is for the betterment of Toronto. He does take the time to offer his (mostly) sympathetic rebuttals to the criticisms that are levelled at him.

“Nevertheless, when it comes to ‘what makes a city great’, his beliefs are hugely different from mine. Like, black and white. I consider him to be a cynic when it comes to things such as civic pride and the role of special interest groups and City Council. I also think that a good neighbourhood relies upon mixed property values and varied types of zoning. He would likely see my views as naive and idealistic.

“For example, at one point, he asked the camera a rhetorical question: ‘What is the primary concern of politicians?’ I answered immediately—and aloud—‘The constituents.’ Then he replied, ‘Getting re-elected.’

“They edited out the best parts, namely, when I talked about Jane Jacobs’ idea of ‘good’ gentrification vs. ‘bad’ gentrification. And Brad gets to rebut everything I say. It is his show after all. But they play the ‘This Lamb Sells Condos’ song against a montage of the current construction at (what I think is) West Harbour City on Fleet St. Wow!” [source]

Brad J. Lamb said…

“I was told about [the song because of an article] on Torontoist, and I went to it, and I looked at it, and I thought ‘Well, that’s kinda weird,’ and I laughed because I thought it was funny. I don’t take myself that seriously, I really don’t, so I laughed about it.

“Basically what [Owen] said, if I understand, is that it’s not really specifically about Brad, it’s about guys like Brad, and because his boyfriend lived in the same building as me and they had some contact with me of some kind, then I was the character. I guess also that I’ve deliberately put myself in the public’s eye and I am a visible person to attack, so I was the guy that he attacked.”

Then Lamb was read the conversation in the lyrics and asked whether it was real. He responded, “I didn’t realize that all that was a dialogue of me talking to my girlfriend. No. That particular apartment that he lived in that was, I believe, below me with about eight inches of concrete, no. I’ve got to say that those comments are not correct…no.” [source]

Sound

“‘This Lamb Sells Condos’ is actually a rip-off of John Fahey. I find it to be a wicked compositional basis, which is taking a song written on one instrument and learning it on another and finding out the interesting non-idiomatic things that come out of the instrument that way. If you play the guitar like it’s a piano, you have a new style. That song is just Scott Joplin ragtime really, but there’s nothing more ragtime than Super Mario Brothers.” —Owen [source]

Compilations

The song appears on SPEX CD #63 and Uncut magazine’s Wake Up! 15-Track Guide to New North American Indie.

Live video

Dec 1, 2009 @ Dinner with the Band on IFC

Final Fantasy → He Poos Clouds → “This Lamb Sells Condos”

Lyrics

Music videos

Performances